Warm fuzzies

Let gratitude be the pillow upon which you kneel to say your nightly prayer.  And let faith be the bridge you build to overcome evil and welcome good.

Maya Angelou

I've hit the two week mark!  Two weeks from today, at this very minute, my last flight from Ottawa to Toronto will be touching down at YYZ.  I'll gather my luggage, find my ride, and get back to my little house in Greektown, and start assimilating myself back into urban, big-city life.  

It really does feel like I just got here though.  I have been enjoying my time immensely in Nunavut and almost thought about deferring admission at UW until January... but it's probably best I go back and get it over with while I'm still motivated to finish school.  Nunavut will be around once I finish.  

When I first came here, I wondered how I'd be able to adjust to small town (or rather, hamlet) living.  My friends jokingly referred to Nunavut as "Planet Hoth".  My hiring manager referred to it as "the wild wild west".  I've lived in big cities all my life - Chicago, Berlin, Toronto, Auckland... but you know, the adjustment wasn't so bad.  

What did help, though, were the people of Igloolik.  Everyone is so nice here.  When I've gone on walks through the community, everyone I pass stops and says hi, and usually asks where I'm from.  In the store, if you make eye contact with someone, there's a smile and a wave and a hello.  When I'm driving around, and you pass another car, more often than not you get a wave hello.  People are just genuinely nice here, which is a far cry from Toronto, where I feel people avoid eye contact with you with purpose, like if they look into your eyes you'll get shot straight through with lasers, like that Sphinx-y Southern Oracle in The Neverending Story.  

I've been having some really great social work moments up here as well - great learning experiences, learning more about counseling, how I can better serve people and how I can be a better listener.  With a language barrier, pictures, drawings, smiles and laughter go a long way.  I've learned to take things more slowly.  There's also been some really wonderful moments where I have felt so honoured and humbled to have been able to be there for someone, respond to a cry for help, and have been able to support someone in getting their needs met.  I am truly grateful to those who've come to speak to me, who've opened up their hearts and put their trust in a total stranger, from a different part of Canada, and a different cultural background.  It takes a lot of balls to open up to someone and to talk about difficult things, especially when there is a limited amount of time, and a lot of work to be done, and I am happy to have been able to support some when they have needed it the most.  

A client called to check in about some things today and it was great to hear from them.  When we were getting ready to end the conversation, they stated they had one more thing to tell me.  Sure, I said.  "Karina, I can't thank you enough for all the help you gave me and my family." they said, and my lower lip started to quiver.  "Because of you, I learned how to laugh and smile again and it is the best feeling in the world!".  I think my heart almost stopped when I heard that - in the best way ever.  I explained that they were the ones who did all the work because they were the ones who found the courage inside them to reach out; I was merely there to facilitate the process once they had made that choice (gotta love existentialism).  "No no," they say.  "You showed me I had the courage."  

I might or might not have closed my office door and had a good cry for a few minutes after that.  Once in a great while, I am humbly reminded why I set out on this path to begin with.  These humble reminders are wonderful feelings I tuck away in notebooks, journals, sticky notes in my day planner - when the going gets tough at work or in life I can read these and remember why I do what I do and why I need to continue to do the work that I do.  My wish for them is to one day be able to pay this forward and in turn show compassion and kindness towards another human.  We all need to be good to each other.  I am blessed that I am able to serve.   

Gratitude is the greatest of all heart openers.  When it enters the heart, love pours out.  For every kindness we receive, gratitude inspires a hundred acts of giving.